What makes a life worth living? Are you willing to let go of some things to live a happy life?
There are only three things that a person should have to truly live happily in this world: someone to love, something to do, and something to hope for. These simple things actually do have a greater impact on our lives if only we’re not that blind to see them.
Humans are complicated beings with complicated aspirations and way of doing things. We look for happiness elsewhere, turning a blind eye to the things that we already have. Although there’s nothing wrong with being ambitious and goal-driven, most people have set superficial goals and desires for themselves.
We find happiness in flashy belongings, cheap thrills, and shallow bragging rights. We keep on impressing the wrong people, only to find ourselves miserable in the end.
I used to aspire the same things years ago. I vowed to take revenge against my enemies, prove my critics wrong, and get all the things that would make me the subject of envy to the eyes of those who wronged me. But as years passed, I kind of realized that those were the makings of an insecure and immature person. Falling into those traps won’t actually make me a happy person.
I started to shift my thinking and stop caring about some things that suck the happiness out of me. I’ve taught myself to live without some of the things that I once thought I needed.
Avoid the following things to be perfectly (nothing’s perfect, accept that) happy in your life:
TREATING EVERYONE AS YOUR COMPETITION
We are biologically programmed to compete for our survival. That’s human nature, but putting yourself in the center of all things isn’t. Most of us have this need to become richer, smarter, and more desirable than the person next to us. But this thinking can enslave us without us realizing it at first. If you’ve come to think of it carefully, you can’t actually find happiness in that since you’re not free to be who you really are.
So instead of trying to become better than everyone else, why not start to become better than you were yesterday? Compete with yourself. Rest assured you’ll easily find satisfaction in that once your personal goals are met.
TRYING TO PLEASE EVERYONE
More often than not, we have the tendency to give so much of ourselves to the people we’re trying to please, only to be met with an empty or critical response.
No matter how hard you try, you won’t get everyone’s approval. It’s natural and it’s okay. Accept that fact early on or risk losing yourself in the process of trying to please everybody.
Are you afraid of expressing an unpopular opinion on issues that bother you? Don’t be. Hold on to that sentiment of yours and keep your ground. Your say on things is what’s giving you meaning as a rational person.
EXPECTING EVERYTHING TO BE EASY
You know what are the best things in life? They are the ones that you have attained from hard work. They hold more meaning and value than those that are given to us.
We usually feel quite elated to be doing things that no one else don’t. Sometimes, the thing that frightens us the most but we do anyway, brings the most pride in ourselves. Think bungee jumping or zip lining.
In real life, solving difficult problems and overcoming challenges define who we are. Most times, we’re proud to talk about the things that we have achieved after a tumultuous journey. That’s what makes you inspiring. That’s the kind of bragging that deserves anyone’s respect.
The bottom line is that don’t expect life to be gentle on you. Life will continually give you challenges as long as you live. But this shouldn’t be the reason to be miserable. If you want to define who you are and set yourself away from mediocrity, then always get up every time you fall. Move on and face what’s ahead of you.
HOLDING YOUR GUARD ALL THE TIME
Some people who have experienced being hurt a lot isolate themselves from the rest. They build up walls in certain parts of their lives to avoid getting hurt again. Most of the time, they’re hesitant to build bridges and welcome new people into their lives because of it.
They usually view happiness as a risk and choose to be miserable instead. If you have this kind of thinking, you can infect the people around you with that or repel them for that matter.
I say let go and open yourself up. Don’t be afraid to take risks and grab your chances. Learn to believe and dream, but don’t just stop there. You also have to plan and act on it. Be someone who is brave and a go-getter. Soon, you’ll see a lot of opportunities opening for you. And most likely, they’re the kind of opportunities that bring you more happiness.
GETTING ALL YOUR HAPPINESS FROM A RELATIONSHIP
It’s true that we need someone to love to feel a certain kind of happiness, be it our family, partner, or friends. However, this kind of happiness shouldn’t come from the people closest to us. Instead, this happiness should come from within us.
Don’t allow all your happiness to be dependent on the validation of others. Keep a part of you to yourself so you won’t feel easily hurt when the behavior or attitude of the ones you love changes suddenly. It’s like offering all your power to someone else, which is a good recipe for disaster.
Make peace with yourself first to feel contented and happy with the person you’re with. If you’re not happy with yourself, this radiates to the person close to you. This results to feelings of resentment and disrespect. This is why people always say that you should love yourself first before expecting other people to love you back.
Often times, those people who regard themselves well and know their self-worth are usually those that people look up to.
You can let go of more things that are holding you back or robbing the happiness you deserve. Knowing that your happiness starts within yourself means that it all comes down to the choices you make. You alone are responsible for your misery and happiness.